35 posts tagged “qotd”

What lesson did your father teach you that still helps you in life?

Cigar burns between my toes means daddy loves me.

First "Brokeback Mountain" was a short story written by Annie Proulx. Then, it was a movie directed by Ang Lee. Next, it will be an opera slated to premier during New York's City Opera's 2013 season.

What movie/book would you most like to see turned into an opera?

 

What parenting tip do you swear by?

Spare the rod and beat the shit outta the child for drinking my last Bud lite.

What was your biggest cooking disaster?

I thought I read "broken glass" instead of "two eggs" in the recipe and we all laughed with bleeding mouths until the ambulances came.

Is there anything about the "corporate culture" at your place of employment you wish were different?

No more Generating deliverables from individual contributors on oral POC (point of contact).

What do you do when you get a crush on someone?
Submitted by Desi.

Take pictures of them sleeping, stare at them through the crack of the closet door, re-arrange the dolls on the shelf so they look like their moving, barely whisper so they think they hear voices, time when they get off work so they won't catch you at their house eating pancakes and scratching your balls with their brass candle holder shaped like a goose, the usual goofy stuff love makes you do.

What are your top five break-up songs?
Submitted by gt.

Kill You - Dethklok

Kill You - Korn

I'll Kill You - Terry Grant ft. Jennifer Horne

I Love You... I'll Kill You - Enigma

I WILL Kill You - Cannibal Corpse

What fashion trend are you most excited to wear this season?

     

Has anyone ever done something so horrible to you that "I'm sorry" couldn't fix it?

Ken ate my black olives. I asked Ken; "Where are my black olives I keep in the mustard jar?" He said; "I had an urge for mustard and I found these delicious black olives." I said; "Kennnnn (in my whiny girly voice), those were MY black olives, now I have NO black olives, OR mustard (had to throw the mustard out to use the jar for the black olives)." He said; "Slow down there little lady (his nickname for me), there is a can of green olives in the cupboard." I said; "You know I hate green olives since the "green olives" incident, notice I didn't say "BLACK olives" incident Ken?" He said; "I'm sorry paper cut (his other nickname for me)." I still hate Ken because of this blatent display of rudeness and because he has a big head.  
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What personality trait has gotten you in the most trouble? 

My pimp Cornell says I just GIVE blowjobs away. I think it's because I'm a people person.